Episode Transcription 

This is the Ultimate Advisor Podcast, the podcast for financial advisors who want to create a thriving, successful, and scalable practice. Each week we’ll uncover the ways that you can improve your referrals your team, your marketing, and your business operations, helping you to level up your advising practice, bring in more assets and create the advising practice that you’ve dreamed up, you’ll be joined by your hosts Bryan Sweet, who is moving fast towards a billion dollars in assets under management, Brittany Anderson, the driving force for advisors looking to hire improve their operations and company culture, and Draye Redfern who can help you systematize and automate your practices marketing to effortlessly attract new clients. So what do you say? Let’s jump into another amazing episode of the Ultimate Advisor Podcast. 

Brittany Anderson:

Hello, welcome back. This is Brittany Anderson once again, and as always with my co-host, tri-house, whatever you want to call it, Bryan Sweet and Draye Redfern and we are continuing on our journey of, I think all of our favorite topic really. I mean, I know we say we love our topics all the time. We love talking about this stuff. We wouldn’t be doing it if we didn’t love it. But mindset is something that we all absolutely embrace, something that we all really try to live by is controlling our mindset, focusing on the positive and always having just the greater possibilities in sight. So, we are on episode two of a three part mini-series. Last time we talked about this, we talked about the power of deciding. Of how deciding to really control your mindset, to focus on the positive versus the negative, how that is absolutely essential to your business and to the success of your employees, your team, those around you, just it’s vital to your future.

Brittany Anderson:

So today we’re going to hone in on the concept of gratitude. Now, gratitude, being thankful, however you want to express or say it, it’s not a new concept. You’ve heard this before, but we want to put a little bit of a spin to it. When you really look at the impact that gratitude can have on your life, on your clients’ lives, on your teams’ lives, of your loved one’s lives, it is monumental. And how if you just simply do one little thing, that one little thing being starting your day being intentional with gratitude, it can absolutely take the worst of days and turn them around.

Brittany Anderson:

So think about it. You wake up every morning and you decide that you are going to state three things that you are grateful for. Three simple things that make you happy to be alive and some days that’s about all you can muster up is that I’m happy that I have this breath, that I woke up this morning, and that I have warm water to be able to jump in the shower or cold because I know some people like cold showers, whatever the case is there are things that you could always pinpoint that you can be grateful for.

Brittany Anderson:

So something that, a testament to how much we believe in this, Bryan and I actually partnered and we created a journal. It’s called Imagine, Act, Inspire. You can find it on Amazon, but this is what the whole concept is built around. It’s on maintaining a positive mindset. It has a positive quote for all 365 days of the year. It has a space for you to say, “Here’s what I’m committing to today. Here’s what I’m going to make happen in my day, and then here’s what I’m grateful for.” So Brian has a really cool story that I know he’s going to share today that’s about his Aunt Jean and I am just so excited. Bryan, I’m going to turn this over because I think you just have such a powerful story to share with what Jean actually did with the journal and what gratitude really means to you.
 

Bryan Sweet:

Yeah, that is really an amazing story. Unfortunately, we lost Jean this past year and certainly miss her, but she left me with so many great qualities that I use today and so I want to thank her for that, but the story that Brittany is alluding to is my Aunt Jean was in her early nineties and we created this book and fortunately she’s always been a fan of anything that I’ve done, but we gave her a copy of the book and for whatever reason, this seemed to resonate with her more than literally any human being I’ve run across and she would literally fill out every single page and even write in the sides of the journal. And she would talk and take this book everywhere that she went. She’d take it to church, she’d share it with people at lunch. She had me get copies for all of her friends.

Bryan Sweet:

Matter of fact, we even got to the point where she was talking about this so much that we actually had her over to our office. So we’ve got a video studio and we had her in there and we just actually had a nice conversation while we were videoing her of what it meant to her and why she used it. And it was the first thing that she did every single day. And she was one where we talked about, decide to have a positive day, she would be on the cover of that book because she lost her husband. They had a great life, but she knew that things were going to be difficult and she said, “I’m going to do something that I have control over and that’s to start every day with something positive and something I need to be grateful for.”

Bryan Sweet:

And even though her life has now ended, she is remarkable in the optimism, the positivity and for being in her nineties and she had declining health, but through that whole thing, that never changed. That was always the first thing that she did every single day. And from my standpoint, one, I’m glad it was a book that I helped write, but two, I actually got to experience it. I actually got copies that I’ve shared with Brittany when she passed away and it meant a lot to me because it meant a lot to her and it was one of those things that, although simple, helped her get through some tough times and through life’s challenges in a very meaningful way. And as I mentioned, no matter when you went to see her or you called her, she would always refer to that and she’d say, “Here’s what I wrote today. This is what I’m grateful for today.” And I think we can all learn from that. It’s kind of an amazing thing and it literally just took her minutes a day.

Bryan Sweet:

And I’ve tried to do that also, obviously having written the book, I’ve got access to copies and so use those. But I actually also created my own daily planner and in my daily planner I also have a gratitude section along with some things that we’ve talked about before on, what’s my morning ritual? Well, in my morning ritual are things that help me decide I’m going to have a great day and get me geared up for all of the things to expect during the day. And I also have an evening ritual. And all of those things help you create the habits and the proper format to make sure things go as close to how you’d love them to go as it possibly could.

Bryan Sweet:

So just gratitude in general is amazing. And one of the things you should also do is not only write down why you’re grateful each day, but be sure in every opportunity that you have, share that with your team, why are you grateful for your team and things that they do for you that you probably take for granted, but if they didn’t do them would make your life a lot more difficult. And when your clients are in all the little things, make sure you tell them how much you appreciate everything that they do for you, all the little things, you will be amazed at the response.

Bryan Sweet:

And when you’re grateful, don’t hesitate to send out little gifts showing that gratitude and, even though it’s small, sometimes… And Brittany, maybe you could add to this story, but one time we had a client in and we were talking about literally hundreds of thousands if not millions of dollars of monies we saved them in taxes and things like that. And we were complimenting them on some different things and we gave them a little gift of cookies and that little gratitude gift of cookies meant so much more to them than the actual hundreds of thousands of dollars, we just saved them in their planning. And so sometimes the little things are the big things. So Draye, I know you do a lot of things to practice and express gratitude and maybe give us some of your insights.

Draye Redfern:

Yeah, this is another topic that I absolutely love. So I love this whole mini series. And from my standpoint, I think that a lot of gratitude comes down to perspective. And I think a lot of people sometimes need a perspective adjustment sometimes. And so for me, I mean, I am grateful every time my two feet hit the floor and I get out of bed every morning. I’ve shared a little bit about it in the past, but I died on the operating table having heart surgery while pursuing a professional career in cycling and then six months after that I got better, I was hit by a car and nearly lost my life. And as the bike got sucked under the car and I flew over the car, somersaulting in the air. And so I nearly lost my life actually, I guess technically did the first time around, but it didn’t stick, twice.

Draye Redfern:

And so from my standpoint, I don’t need the third time’s a charm. So I literally wake up every day grateful. And I think for me, I have a bit more perspective on some of those things even though I’m younger, according to many advisers being just 30, but the perspective I think helps. And so sometimes I think taking a step back from realizing the current situation or the frustrations of the day or whatever it is and just pausing to, like Bryan said and what Brittany alluded to also, is just write down something that’s positive. And so one thing that you can do, and one thing that I do every day is just write down one single thing that I’m grateful for every day. I’ve got a, I mean you can’t see, it’s obviously a podcast, but I’ve got a planner that sits right next to me and it has a quote at the top of it, just like Bryan was mentioning. And I literally, as I’m planning my whole day on pen and paper, I write out one thing I’m grateful for.

Draye Redfern:

And it’s little things like that that stack up over time, that really makes a big impression on your subconscious to just be grateful for all of the little things. Another thing that I think it may be a little bit of a shift, maybe you haven’t heard about this as much, is the idea of stop saying, “I’m sorry”, and start more of, “Thank you.” And this comes down to, a lot when it comes to managing the team, because none of us can do what we do and build the business we want to build without having the team around us to support us. And whether that’s that maybe we had an off day, whether we got frustrated or whether someone was late to meeting, being more even grateful in how you recognize constructive criticism, that could be, “I’m sorry that I whatever else it could be.”

Draye Redfern:

Well I don’t apologize, take a second and maybe take a step back and just realize, “You know what? They’re right.” And thank you for pointing this out instead of immediately, a lot of times we do this apology dance. And so really when I get constructive criticism from the team or from clients or whatever it is, I’m grateful for it because it really helps to make me a better person, it helps to make the organization better, it helps to make my team better people. And there’s all sorts of trickle down effects that come from that.

Draye Redfern:

And then the, I suppose a tactical thing when it comes to gratitude that you could do inside of the business and even in your personal life is, we all have those fleeting thoughts. And it’s like, “Haven’t talked to my mom in a week and a half or wonder how my buddy Gordon’s doing?” Or, whatever it may be, we have these fleeting thoughts like, “I should reach out to them or I should send them something”, or whatever it is, just do it. Just take the three seconds that it takes and send them a voice memo on your iPhone or maybe it’s a text message or if you got maybe 30 or 60 seconds, shoot a video. Just say, “Hey listen, I just really want to let you know I’m thinking about you today. I hope all is well. I just really wanted to let you know, I love having it in my life and I look forward to the next time we can see each other, whenever that would be.”

Draye Redfern:

Things like that, if someone gets that and they’re not expecting it, absolutely light up their day. It can make their week as a highlight of their week, but you feel good doing it in the sense too because you’re grateful for the people around you. I think in this culture and the society that we live in, we’re all too busy with the dings and the rings and the vibrations and the chirps and all the other push notifications that we get that our attention is pulled in so many different ways that we start to lose some of that H to H, that human to human contact. And so just being grateful for the people around us even to just tell them. And that makes you feel really good in the process as well.

Draye Redfern:

So I suppose before we sort of wrap it up, is that there’s things that you could do no matter how much time you have during the day. Like Bryan mentioned, it can be something like jotting down one thing that you’re grateful, reading the quotes every day, you could send out the texts or the videos and things like that and just really be more present sometimes with the family and friends and the people in our lives to make them know as well how grateful we are about them. Because the trickle down effect can really go a long way. So, all of that being said, Brittany, is there anything that you want to send us off with today?

Brittany Anderson:

Yeah, so of course I have a couple of comments. I always have comments.

Draye Redfern:

I know you do. I love it.

Brittany Anderson:

So, one thing I wanted to add that I was thinking of, Bryan, as you’re sharing your story about Jean and talking about her journal, I just immediately was thinking about, I sat down and I’ve read her journal, I’ve read all of her comments and it just warms my heart because she was such a special, special lady and a big influence in Bryan’s life. And something that she wrote so common that she was thankful for was her home. And I don’t know why, but that just stuck with me. It stuck with me from the first time that I saw it, is just, “Wow, that’s something so simple that we all take for granted.” So if you think about this, it shouldn’t be that hard to really decide what it is you’re grateful for, what it is that you want to practice. And show gratitude to because we are so fortunate with where we live.

Brittany Anderson:

Think about the pain and the anguish and the suffering that goes on across the world. I mean, if you’re listening to this, you’re in a pretty sweet spot. You’re in a pretty nice spot. Even your bad days would be perceived as a best day for somebody else who’s not given the luxuries that we have, that we’ve been granted and that we’ve earned per se, or that we’ve worked hard for. Some people don’t even have the chance to be able to work hard to build something like you’ve built. So, that just always stuck with me, just having that pride in her home. And that was so heartwarming.

Brittany Anderson:

The other thing that I wanted to touch on is, Bryan started talking about it, and Draye you started talking about it too, about how expressing gratitude to your team. And I think that whole thing that you started saying Draye about, stop saying sorry and start saying, thank you. I think that’s really powerful. But one thing that I’ve noticed with our team at Sweet Financial is that even when they’re frustrated with something, so this is just how ingrained gratitude is into our culture, even when they’re frustrated and I’m having a meeting with somebody or they’re telling me about something that’s gone wrong, about something that blew up or whatever it is, the language around it is almost always, “I’m frustrated or I’m mad or this happened or whatever.” But there’s always a, “but”.

Brittany Anderson:

There’s somebody in our office, Jessica, who likes to call it the but sandwich. She says it in the other aspect though, where it’s like, “It’s always this, we’re good, but we got to do this because we’re all achievers here. So that’s just how we work.” But the but sandwich in this example is really that they’ll talk about being frustrated, they talk about something that’s gone wrong, but again, instead of sitting there and dwelling on it, there’s always a but and then something that they’re grateful for. So it’s always, “Hey, this happened and I’m frustrated and I’m kind of stuck right now, but at least this went right.” So there’s constantly that language in the office. And it’s funny because once you start putting your antennas up to it, you start noticing it.

Brittany Anderson:

So again, this whole segment on mindset, this whole segment on decision, how we talked about that previously. Now we’re talking about gratitude, it really ties into your culture. So we talk about this a lot, that we really hone in on culture at our mastermind where we talk on, not just the surface stuff, not just like, “Okay, make sure that you show appreciation here and there and give them a career path, that’ll get them.” No, it doesn’t work anymore. People don’t care about that stuff, people care about feeling like they’re heard, feeling like they’re seen and feeling like you truly are grateful for what they bring to the table because they want to do that too. They want to express that gratitude. That’s part of building a deeper culture. So this is all stuff that we go into in the mastermind and it’s proven time and time again to be so essential to breaking through that ceiling of complexity that you might be at.

Brittany Anderson:

So if you’re looking, and this is where it gets interesting because if you’re looking at where you might be stuck in your business, maybe you’re trying to get to a new asset threshold or you’re trying to grow your production, a lot of times it’s that space between your ears that’s holding you back. So Bryan, he talks about this all the time, but really the only limitation we have, it’s not your demographic, it’s not that you have a cruddy team, it’s not that you don’t maybe have all ideal clients. I mean that’s all excuses. Really, your barrier to growth is that space between your ears.

Brittany Anderson:

So if you put the right mindset in place, you focus on what you’re grateful for and you have that constant decision to move forward, to power through the bad stuff, to get to the good, that’s what’s going to help you grow your business. That’s what’s going to help you get to the next level that you want to get to and that you want to break through. So I’ll get off my soap box and I’m going to roll us out, anything else, Draye, Bryan, that you want to comment on before I roll us out with a few key items that our listeners can implement immediately?

Draye Redfern:

I didn’t want you to stop. You want to just keep going for another 20 or 30 minutes?

Brittany Anderson:

Draye, on this topic, I can go for days.

Draye Redfern:

I know, I love this stuff. We all do. It’s so much fun to be a part of it. But no, I think that there’s a lot of great advice when it comes to focusing on the gratitude and the outlook. And I think, whether you’ve got five seconds or five minutes, there’s plenty of things that you could do or take away from this episode that you could probably implement in your own life just to make a better difference in your own life and your team and the people around you. So this is definitely a favorite one. So, thank you for tying it off with a pretty little bow like that Brittany, it’s great.

Brittany Anderson:

Absolutely. So three things that you could implement immediately in your business. Number one, the simple act of journaling. And journaling doesn’t have to be pages at a time. It’s maybe one simple note, like Draye said, it’s one thing you’re grateful for. Write it down, be intentional with it. Second takeaway, practice gratitude with your team. And when I say team, obviously this is a business oriented podcast, so I mean your team immediately, but really this expands. Your team is your family, your team is not just the people that you work with, it’s your family, it’s your friends, it’s the people that you choose to be around. We’re actually going to talk on that in the next episode about how important that is when it comes to mindset. So, really think about how you can practice gratitude and how you can help others express that in the same manner, the people that are around you.

Brittany Anderson:

And then finally, because I thought this was so powerful Draye, when you were talking, is to stop saying sorry and start saying thank you. Be open to constructive criticism because people are truly trying to help you to improve, to get even better. So, whether it’s you giving that feedback to your team and relaying that message of the thank you versus sorry, or it’s you accepting it and owning that and really saying, “Hey, gosh, I have to take a step back because I am so grateful that you’re even taking the five seconds to tell me how I could get even better because if you didn’t say anything, it probably means you didn’t care about me in the first place.” So I think that’s just exceptional. That’s such a good, a great practice actually to implement into your business, into your life. Anytime you get that constructive feedback, I might keep it a secret from my husband though. I maybe need to hear that, “sorry”, once in a while. You just never know. So all that being said, this rounds out this episode of the Ultimate Advisor podcast. We’ll catch you back here next week.

Brittany Anderson:

Hey there, Brittany Anderson here. If you are loving what you’re hearing on our Ultimate Advisor podcast, don’t keep us a secret. Share us with other advisors that you think would benefit from the messages that you are hearing. The easiest way to do that is to simply send them to ultimateadvisorpodcast.com. And if you want to learn a few other ways that we could potentially serve you as an advisor, go check out ultimateadvisormastermind.com. As always, we are so happy to have you here with us as part of the Ultimate Advisor community, and we look forward to a continued relationship.